one big roller coaster ride for me this weekend till now in fact.. but i know or rather i hope things will become smoother.

i know if it was a choice, his power would certainly overpower mine. i know i have no right to stop people from making their choice. i know my importance. i know i might be a slight obstruction cos of my importance. i know i'm not being really nice right now. i know it might lead to strain. all these i know.

but all these are struggles i go through. call me scared, call me insecured and i will admit all of these. i'm afraid to lose u.... yet i dun deny i want to feel connected. just not the way everyone's pacing me. i sae i need time... and i really do and i wan my baby to be beside me, walking my pace.. and both of us together. it means alot to me..... i dun wanna feel abandoned.

i want to be with u.. very much and i wan us to walk through this together.. side my side. tt's wad i thought after these few days of turmoil..... haha.. all my worries and fears. tt i will lose my baby.

but i noe i wun..... =)