And I am home alone... again! Mum went Chiangmai 2 days after dad went Bangkok. Dad would be back on tues or wed then there will be someone at home at least. wish i had a sister, it would be nice to have someone around without parents cos mummy almost drained me each and everytime we go into a long conversation.

It has been one roller coaster ride for me since Friday. Everything doesn't seem right since then. Nothing anyone says make sense, nothing i do is right, nothing i do makes me feel right again. it is call spiraling. i need to get out of this before it hurts someone. someone told me i am escaping. running away from doing the things i need to do instead of solving the problem.

time to find a new hobby... like gym!! i will definitely sign up for a gym soon. i need to face it head on.

Dear God, give me the strength i need.