i m very very happy these two daes!! i did well for mi o's and to mi surprise, it was extremely well. didn't expect miself to get tt kind of resutls... thnx everyone for giving mi the necessary comfort when i needed them. thnx for motivating mi and tellin mi i can do it... i did it! ahaha... aniwae, mi confirm goin to a poly. i figure out tt even if i go to a jc now, dere's no way i can ever catch up and like the a's is just next yr. i wld be damn stressed up so wad for i put miself into tt kind of situation again. nw just considering wad courses to take and to choose between na and sp. die lah.. wad if by wed, i still cannot decide wad i wan... aniwae, after collecting results on fri, went to town for a celebration. went seoul's to eat. wanted to go k box but too ex. den after seoul's, ys and i decided to go for a drink. angel and cf didn't want... ys practically paid for the whole dinner and da drinks for mi so now, all in all, i owe her 50 bucks... haik, mi pay this mth ar.. not enough for mi expanses lor. mi company ar.. esp mi manager frankie is all big cheater.. he ar.. sae cos i had gd results, must treat all of them to seafood and drinks. can u believe it.. gd results does not equals to money and cash!!! after da drinks... baby came to pick mi up in town den we went to east coast to chill out... it was a nice nite... didn't reach hm until 2.. mum didn't nag soo much cos i told her i needed the celebration! last night... went out with baby after work. we went to watch movie... hmmm... it wasn't exceptionally nice... but quite ok lah.. den we went to this vietnamese restaurant to try their food. hmmm.. it was not too bad.. da price also quite reasonable... we like doin a market survey leh.. comparing other viet rest. food to ours... den after tat.. went to this open air place to have a little drink.. sat dere.. see stars.. tok tok.. hee... was a very nice night. took cab home tho. and when i came home.. mum noticed i drank.. blah blah.. and she just cannot stop nagging. mi head already hurts like hell. soo i told her it wld really work if she just shut up! aniwae... tink mi skin ar.. quite sensitive to alcohol... which is bad... aniwae.. i tink i put on weight... grew fatter!!! die lah.... baby sure sae put on a little more also nvm but cannot! ahaha.. aniwae.. gg out with her later... miss her.. =)

mi dearest cousin, debbie left for perth yesterdae evening. many pple went to send her off... including her diff grps of frens. it is the dae we are all preparing for long ago.. and now, she's over at perth. tot i wld shed buckets of tears but i didn't cry yesterdae. it just felt very sad inside.. knowing tt i can't turn to her conveniently if i need anyone. there wld be no one to guide mi along.. no one to nag a little at mi... i m gonna miss her soo much... she's right when she once said. things wld be diff when she comes back cos pple change and the surroundings change too. not shure we wld have this bond anymore. there wld be the effort being put in to keep in touch... but she is right... pple do drift apart whether we liked it anot... =\ aniwae.. todae's mi off dae! lalala... slacked like hell todae.. practised a little organ tho. feb gonna end soon. results are coming out soon and mi payday is goin to come soon too. a brand new start for mi to get out of mi laziness. a start for mi to stop depending on her so much cos i realli ve no idea when is she gonna leave mi. better start learning how to be a strong and independent girl... damn tired now.... better go rest.. tmr's a long dae at work.

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was quite disapponited this morning. debbie leaving tmr and like tonite, the be-na-brah supposed to have a nite feast.. it's like the last nite feast before she leave.. kinda planned it quite long ago yet ar.. debbie got her own plans tonite and dun even noe mi cousin noes abt it anot... went to work as usual. todae is mi being a vegetarian dae.. ahaha. found out tt tampines got a foodcourt tt has great vegetarian food. even she agreed tt da food is great... she kinda cheered mi up quite abit todae cos she was soo lame and cranky... hee and cute at the same time.. it realli brings a smile to mi lor... after work, waited for yansing and we went to sign up for the french course.... it's gonna start on 10th march.. hee.. can't wait. den after we break our vegetarian period at 6.. went tiong bahru to have dinner... tiong bahru plaza is actualli not too bad.. shld go there more often... got alot of stuff to look at and dere's a pasar malam dere tt's gonna last for 16 daes! cool!!! ahahha... i love pasar malams!!!tmr gonna wake up earli cos big boss wants 300 salad roll for acjc's funfair.. his son is fmr dere mah so we workers hafta go dere earli to help wrap... ahahha.. need to be dere by 8... tink i better go slp nw.. can't take it animore....

alot of pple is complaining tt i dun have a life. or i dun have time for dem.. saying i m always very busy and hard to reach... it is not true, k! i still reply sms wad.... aniwae, did self reflection. realised tt i can't just slack until sch starts in july and let mi brain rot and die... n also mi life can't just revolve ard her and work... make mi sound soo useless. had a little argument with her yest.. however wad she said all make sense... i need to do sum plannin for mi future and not wait until july soo da basic thing to do is to start with mi organ... haven't been touching it for yrs... teacher complaining liao and like she keeps naggin abt how near mi exams are cuming.. which is end of march i tink... gotta do well... wanna complete grade 8 and maybe a diploma all before 20... or maybe 21.... and started reading newspapers.. sumthing which i realli dun like in the past.. even if i read in the past, i wld read newpaper.. cos i tink it's more interesting but now i m actualli reading straits time... she actualli bought a copy for mi todae and sae i better read until the papers rot and tear.. ahahhaa... i m also tinking of learning a foreign lang. most prob french.. gonna get yansing to learn with mi... kk... i feel a little motivated.. =) which is good.. hee

sobz. why is everyone in sch now. m feeling realli down and shitty now. i need to complain to sumone, need to tok to sumone yet i cannot find anyone. da best part is i wun start work till 4 and tt leaves mi alot of time to tink at home. da more i tink, da worse i feel. it all started when she called mi last nite, or rather earli this morn when she got home after clubbing. ya, it's her tt's affecting me. hu esle can it be at this pt of time. hate dis kinda feeling. it just shows tt she's getting more and more impt to mi to affect mi this bad. realli hate miself. hate miself for crying to sleep last night. i told miseld when things are under this kind of unknown situation, never let miself get hurt and not to drop a single tear. this is da second time. and da worse thing is... i hate miself for putting in soo much when she is not. i m not asking her to make a decision but the fact tt she has to consider things already depressed mi liao. i m not impt to her enough for her not to consider other things and just make a chioce. grrrr.... this is irritating mi.. and affecting mi badly... y can't i treat things lightly... ya.. i noe the reason.. i ve sunk quite deeply... i noe no matter how things ended up.. i wld get hurt through the process and ultimately at da end. this is bad... i realli hate miself for being so wishy- washy.... sumone just give mi a tight slap and wake mi up frm this....

mi dae didn't start off well and as usual, it's all thnx to tt woman i call mum. i just feel tt she dun understand mi at all. maybe this is partly mi fault cos i didn't give her da chance to. and y can't she be happy as long as i m happy... can she tink more for mi like the things or pple tt can actualli make mi happy and not things tt wld make her happy... and since she cannot try to tink in mi shoes, den can she just leave mi alone... sum things are not meant to be shared with her now... i will one dae but just now now.. cxan she respect this decision of mine? even if she can try to stop mi frm doin things, she cannot stop mi frm wanting these things.... grrr... she realli realli irritates mi... i cannot stand it anymore... either i vanish frm her life or she vanish frm mi life... haik... i start work @ 5 todae so i popped over to suntec to visit cf... cf was nice... cheered mi up with all her lameness... she ar.. can be quite irritating but todae, i realli appreciate it.. thnx... was feeling a little down when i went for work... a little moody but things are fine now. she's online now with mi... doin her work... aniwae.. m a little hungry.. ate quite little todae... a big contrast to the daes when i always eat till very bloated... i wan maggie but m too lazy to cook...

my feet hurts! all thnx to da new sports shoe tt i wore out todae. it's so tight! now mi leg got blisters already and it hurts! ahaha, aniwae, had a cousins' outing todae. it's been such a long time since da 3 of us hang out together. met at parkway parade in da afternoon and we shopped ard. hmmm, tt place changed alot since da last time i went which was like more than 5 yrs ago. after shoppin ard, walked to east coast to cycle. the sun is soo hot.. n i stupidly chose a bike tt's kinda too big for mi. i ended up aching everywhere, mi arms and esp mi ass! grrr... after cycling, we decided to chill out at mcafe... hee... mi first time dere.. it's actualli not tooo bad.. hmmm.. after cycling, we realised we still got many places to go soo we kinda rushed ourselves.. went bugis cos debbie wants to get her organiser and deborah wants to get a pair of slippers. after bugis.. we wanted to walk to funan but the walk was long and deborah cldn't take it soo she offered to hire a cab and tt she wld pay... tt girl ar.. bloody rich leh.. jealous! went funan soo tt debbie can collect her bag then i went up to vietro to 'check mi schedule'.... quite sad... dey were busy.. no one noticed mi presence! hmmm... and finally our final destination of the dae is to amk to eat steamboat... i m impressed.. coffeeshop actualli offers buffet style steamboat and it's onli like 11 bucks... the food is not tooo bad as in i dun ask much for 11 bucks... it's actualli quite a good deal. wld bring her dere one of these daes.... after eating... we talked alot... abt mi, abt dem... it's nice... i noe i wld definitely miss this type of outings once debbie goes australia.... soobz after da dinner, travelled home miself.. decided to save money as i m realli realli broke now, i walked home frm tampines interchange sespite da fact tt mi feet hurts like hell! m tinkin whether shld i go find a second job as mi working hrs at vietro now are getting lesser... i need cash... can't stand being broke...

da dae started off well. b4 work started, we went to eat breakfast. it was a nice breakfast. den after breakfast, mi tummy felt very wierd and before i knew it, i m running to and fro frm the toilet puking mi life out. it was a very terrible feeling. felt too sickly tt i cannot even work. i m supposed to end work at 2 but ard 12.. i cannot make it oreadi. had to get daddy to cum to fetch mi frm funan.. tink i have a slight fever. when i reached home, i just fell into bed.. felt soo damn weak. da best part is mi fone keep ringing.. both hse fone and hp.. cldn't get a proper rest... just keep lying on da bed.. no energy to get off manz. after work, she called. tok to her for a little while... and she sae she wanna go rest cos she goin out tonite mah. hmmm... was craving for fish porridge den... aniwae... i was supposed to call her and wake her up frm her little rest.. but she seemed busy.. i was a little sad.... den ard 9 plus... she actually pop up @ mi hse.. she actualli went chinatown to get mi fish porridge.. i m soo damn touched... i feel like seeing her, i m already half recovered already... stayed at mi hse and waited for mi to finish mi porridge.... wanted her to stay longer... but she goin out tonite... aniwae, i haven't bathe yet ever since i came hm.. too sick.. tink i better go bathe now.. hee

was too lazy to blog last night when i reached home. mum bought this medcine from the chinese medical hall and made mi drink it. was quite disgusting... mi whole body felt very weak after drinking it, cld onli lie on da bed and wait for her to call mi.. aniwae, watched another movie yesterdae. it is quite an old movie... love mi if u dare.. french movie... initially, didn't understand wad the movie was abt but after the movie... realised if i looked at it in another pt of view.. can be quite meaningful... watched too many movies nowadaes, eat too much nowadaes... it's just da start of feb and i m oreadi feeling broke... can't wait for mi next pay... =) felt quite down yesterdae. came to realise tt dere are many things i cannot do for her... felt quite useless... but she was nice... cheered mi up alot... aniwae... i did not have to go to work todae.. all thnx to mi darling friend chinfang... but nvm lah... it's afternoon shift soo not soo bad.. better go get ready for work...

supposed to wake up at 8 this morning cos mi work starts at ten but i overslept and did not wake up till 9... rushed like mad this mornin.. did not even have a decent bath but i figured tt even if i took a decent bath, i wld still stink at the suntec foodcourt... tt place just makes mi smell fishy and oily.. eww. disgusting manz. aniwae, was late to work, as usual.. it's been a week since i go to the foodcourt to work... got transfered between funan and suntec... aniwae, mi working hrs are getting lesser and lesser.. company need to cut cost.. maybe i shld start looking for another job? heard baby's fren's workin place needs a waitress... working hrs are 6 to 11... tinking whether shld i do it...kk, aniwae, work ended earli.. at 2 todae.. den i went over to funan.. to get sum computer stuff for daddy den i hang ard vietro tp help out... blah blah blah.... she supposed to end work at 6... we stayed on almost until 8 cos dey were short handed... i was quite pissed cos i very hungry.. aniwae, had a goood dinner... big fish big prawns again.... had seafood steamboat and fried kway teow... yummy!!! den we took bus back to tampines.... slept on the bus.. aniwae, mi flu is not gettin better and i havin a cough now too... hmm.. tink i passed mi cough to her... feel a little bad... kk lah.. yawns.. i m tired liao... better go sleep.. aniwae.. todae wld be a GREAT dae cos i m off!!! =) ahahahha