i'm so glad i decided to meet up with my girls after all today. i'm actually in my best mood now ever since the start of this week. maybe it's the tgif thing but i'm sure our usual friday night in with the guess show helped a greal deal. i'm feeling alot better than any other days in this week. thanks alot girls.. although most probably, angel will only read it. never mind, help me convey to the rest, k.. i really appreciate it.

very very much appreciate all the little gestures of concern i received from pple. really. this week has been rough for me. my morale has not been this down since a long time already. downcasted like the grey skies threatening that a storm's ahead. moods to the very extreme big B-- bad. and really sorry how badly i may ve mistreated my boy.

i ve to admit, i'm pretty lucky through out my entire life. i knew that when i came to deal with the fact tt i cannot handle stress. simply speaking, i break down. needless to say, someone who still has difficulty managing stress and anger suck most at handling something tt i cannot do anything about. people always sae we only learn to treasure things when we lose them or in jeopardy in losing them. i totally agree. but on the other hand, if i never go through this, i would not noe how to treasure or even learn how to. it's a must go through process i would say. this week has really been rough and tormenting. it became clear to me tt i started rejecting helping hand and support tt it suddenly occured to me tt i'm recoiling. away from life, away from pple. this is so familiar and once part of my life. but i met friends. i met pple who changed my life. so i ve no intention of repeating tt part of myself to disappoint pple whom care for me and whom i care for. so i reach out to the many hands available. and open up, it's a good start isn't it? or i would start living my life like a recluse all over again.

so it's another learning lesson in my life. no biggie yea? i certinaly hope i can handle it. so i still say i'm so glad i had my little gathering with my girls. it's really the thing i need before i drop.

it's a turning point. it definitely is.