i am in love with:

1. chocolate tarts
2. kate spade
3. self-blended fruit juice
4. Teddy chocolate bisucits

i need more stuff to put a smile on my face

a woman asked a guy, is it true that all guys are not devoted. is it true that all guys will side track in a relationship.

the guys replied. there's not yes or no answer here. there are two types of woman. the first type will be those that are willing to accept everything, forgive everything despite how bad the guy may be. at the end of the day, she choose to stay by his side and love him whole heartedly. The second type of woman will be those that despite having a guy who loves her whole heartedly, yet they still choose to give him away.

my point is that, there's no yes or no the the questions i asked above... but which type of woman are you.

it's time to put an ending to all these misery. not for me.... hopefully for us

i crave korean food, indian food.... anything tt's spicy.... and i know i can find what i want at raffles place or little india.

learning learning

you're are right.

i know the world doesn't revolve around me. it's not that my world revolves only around you. it's just that i placed you priority over others. maybe that's not true either. i try to give you everything i can, yet on the other hand, i try to give others everything that i can too. maybe you're envious, that i can have best of both worlds? so u try to find your best of both worlds. then again. you're not that complex. whatever you do, the motive is very clear. you just cannot read ur inner self conscious the way i can read it. on the other hand, i'm very happy there's transparency.

to many other people, they keep seeing things in the short term.. but i see it in the long term. i don't expect you to understand my inner fears of rejection, my inner fears of changes. but i'm already 21. and i promised you and myself that i wanna change for the better. but who defines better or not? every individual has a different definition of what's better or not. is yours right or mine? but i feel when opinions are formed, especially for you, they don't change anymore despite my efforts. so i tell myself, for me, i just want to be happy for u when u found something in your life other than me. imagine if i can be jealous over non-living things or living things for that matter, what will i do with the kids in the future.

i must try to change. i don't know in which direction is this changing to. cos i just know i want myself to feel better. i don't wanna get upset over mundane stuff like that. if you were what you sae you were going to do, there would be more of these mundane stuff coming at me and if i don't learn to deal with it now, how am i going to deal with it in the future.

but deep down inside, why am i still resisting to changes? maybe others might not get it, but when there's something slowly shifting right in my eyes, i feel awful. awful enough to bury myself under covers for days.

It was a homely weekend spent. The weather was very nice for the both of us to just nua at home too. It was japanese day on Saturday. I'll let the pictures do the work.


My potion that looked like tomato sauce but tasted quite alright: apple, carrot and tomato juice.


Appetiser: Salmon

The only sushi i wrapped. he claimed mine was fat and not nice! so i gave up.

The set-up

He wrapped the remaining sushis

Final masterpiece, 9 rolls in all

Dessert. I love it... but this is depleting in supermarkets. can hardly find them anymore.

haha, here comes the birthday aftermath. have i kept u guys waiting for too long? it was a mild sunny day on 21082008. it rained a little but the weather was always nice to us when we got out of the car, so no umbrellas were needed. though my precious one would complain it got a little humid, the effects of after rain. we went sentosa, drove there. i love it when there's transport. went underwater world. he says it's to fulfill one of my many wishes. i think he just cannot believe that somebody had never gone to underwater world before. =/ it's expensive wad. and i never ever see a reason to go. cos the only thing i had in mind when i came out is i wanna eat stingray and crabs! but it was enjoyable. he promised me cable car and images of singapore next time. =)



After which, we headed to chijmes-- Capella Modern Italian Restaurant. He said he read it from a magazine and it looks good. It really is good, be it the ambience, or the food. I love it.






His must-have tiramisu.

Happy Birthday to me!

On the eve of my birthday, i decided to sit down properly and upload pictures. I decided to use collages to represent my pictures cos there were simply too many, over 200, and some pending from ladyironchef. and i decided to change skin too.. fresh start, fresh look. and anyway, the party would not ve been a success without:

My parents

and xcyflawx.

More birthday pictures coming up (i hope) and thanks once again to everyone who made my bdae special in one way or another. Love love! Hugs

finally, the well anticipated 16082008 is over. i had a blast and i thank every single one of you guys who made it to my party. maybe you don't think so but everyone's presence has made this party special in one way or another. i'll upload the pictures soon, i guess. luckily, i got something else to anticipate, which is the actual birthday itself. or else this year, my birthday will be on the 16th, instead on 21st. and just in case anyone forgot... my birthday party is on the 21st!!!!!!!!

thank you everyone once again, i thank yan especiailly for the video, for organising the party, for settling everything so i could just stay pretty and enjoy. and thanks amelia for the 13 presents she gave me to signify the 13 years of friendship we had. what can i say, i'm glad we're still going strong. thanks all the photographers.. i feel like a star with all the flash. can't wait to see the pictures. remember to send me, k. thanks for the presents xcyflawx gave me. seriously, i don't know what to say. i promise to the the present proud by putting in lotsa accessories. maybe u guys will see it sooon, @ the party @ my house in the near future. and bdaes are never the same w/o boon's cards, boon's handicraft. love it love it! and i simply cannot resist but i love the hershley peanut butter chocolates! thank yoooouuuuu tabitha. of course lastly, i have to thank my parents for making this all possible. for taking care of me till 21 to celebrate this birthday.

i feeel very very very loved. thank you thank you.. once again again.

my makeover photoshoot. yes, i know it's unlike me and vvery pinky. haha.. =)

I'm a very happy girl today and that's cause:

1. my baby is off today. national day's off day.
2. i finally finally got my makeoever pictures.
3. daddy and mummy bought me 2 gold pendant and a chain
4. my party's this weekend and i'm trying to stay happy all the way
5. amelia's gg to be back tmr!

when i have all these things to be happy about. should i frown when i grew many many new pimples... all near the nose?

i have to admit because i noticed many cases already that guys are actually better cooks than us women. haha. yes, takes alot to admit but out of 10 cases, there are at least 8 of them that's true. oh well.... yet, there's always differences in the kitchen still.

like a girl hates it when a guy cooks.. and why is that so? cos they dun clear up as they cook, they choose to clear up only after cooking, after dinner, dessert den rest a long while before they choose to wash and clear up the kitchen. and it irks the girl very very so. but when a girl cooks.. the guy always has this mentality, i dun mind, but i know i can do better. therefore, they always will add in a few "friendly" comments, which some girls can or cannot take. depends on how friendly the comments are.

haha.. just something interesting i feel

and amelia.... miss u. come back soooon.

someone told me before happiness is usually self-defined. that you know what makes you happy. however, sometimes i feel happiness comes when we least expect it. or happiness can also be things or people that you didn't know could have make you happy. and it only happens at that instant and that moment. even if we were to repeat the things or people, it might not be the same feeling that it first gave us.

and when i slowly begin to realise that and understand it... i really treasure times that make me happy. cos the feeling that i have cannot be repeated and neither do i want it to, cos the feeling will not be the same anyway.

it's that captured moment, captured in my heart. that's where my happiness comes from. accumulated of captured moments that i didn't know exist before that.

there are so many material things i want. right now.. like seriously.... i want...

1. a pair of nice flats to go with my pretty nails
2. to go for the eat my dead skin therapy.. i don't know what's the name of it
3. a good moisturiser
4. a dress for my birthday
5. a very pretty clutch bag

My Levi's itch is itching again. everytime of the year.... =/

money dropping from sky?

i don't know how to describe my current feelings. i hope you understand. somethings have changed but every day is still moving on. no one has stopped living, everyday life is still moving along. we're still very much in love aren't we? i think i need to reassemble the scattered pieces of my life. and make a new picture out of it.

i hate it when plans get screwed. especially in a bad way!

and that's my lovely cousin/godsis on her 5th birthday. she and the birthday bear jie bought for her.

i realised mondays are the best to blog. i love to sit down on a monday morning, recalling the beautiful weekend that just passed then type them out in words. i finally got my jogging shoes during the weekends. i expected it to be difficult but i'm surprised at how efficient we were or rather he were so within minutes of steppin into town, we got it already. so people out there who actually saw my wishlist... jogging shoes are out! that means so is adidas vouchers.... oh... but actually i won;t mind running attire. like shorts and the sleeveness v v comfy singlet looking top. haha... new sports bra is fine too! oh, and did i mention, the running shoes is a gift! my first 21st birthday gift. =)

so we were shopping around town, looking for a small water bag tt he can carry while we jog, one tt can put our ezlink cards, keys and all as well. we just went sports shop over and over again. it's quite interesting cos usually i wun even step foot in there. anyway, dinner was at Big Fish and must i say it again, i really love the place! why did we go there after such a long time. we should really go there more often. No pictures though, i was just enjoying myself too much to hassle myself. haha. the lady boss told me there's a new menu coming up.. interesting. i cannot wait. anyway, this Bigfish treat is on me to celebrate the boy's commissioning. look how long it was already and till now then we go.

We had nice scallops for appetisers. They are just special for the month only. Baby had his swordfish while i stick to pasta. Dessert is normal for him, which is tiramisu and i tired something else other than warm chocolate souffle. Now i wish i hassled myself to take pictures, cos with pictures, i dun ve to describe. oh well.... next time den.

so a lovely sat den a beautiful sunday. movie and dinner. i'm looking forward to tonight though. then i would be seeing him again. haha.. dear boy, i just wanna let you know i love the fact that you plan things for us to do together. love the fact tt we got identical socks, and u intend for us to get similar phones. i'm just like a small girl as i was told often. such stuff really makes me happy. =) all in all, nice weekend. love ya to bits!

finally finished album 1. i developed those pictures a long time ago and bought the album even longer time ago and yet, i recently just finished the album. oh, i failed to mention, the album is all on photos before nic went army. so i need to start on album 2 sooon, photos after nic enter army. mark my words and today's date cos who knows when album 2 will actually literally surface.

cooked a quick dinner for the boy before i rushed down to gm's place for dinner. it's the grandpapa's death anniversary. as usual, our family gathering is always @ gm's place and always with her home cooked food. standard pig intestine soup, her special meatballs etc. this time round got crabs and tom yum soup... and brown rice. wad's with healthy brown rice. anyway, i had a good time. ashley still as cute, and i had a short nice fun time with the cousins. it's been that long... since we laughed and talked face to face.

anyway, life is full of this and that. anyone can fill in whatever this and that may mean to any individual person. i was thinking, everyone has a inner rhythem in their life. as a member of the choir once, i remember the conductor once told us. when u are singing a fast song, u should be counting the rhythem in your heart slow. because if u count it fast, u'll end up singing faster than the music. and vice versa tt applies for slow music. anyway, everyone has their own rhythem. but i feel that if u are naturally a fast person, ur inner rhythem must be slow. or else, how do u get to enjoy life, enjoy the sunset, enjoy long walks and the sound of birds and crickets. what ever it may be.. but sometimes life can be enjoyed in a slow way.

however, u cannot take everything slow in ur life.. u got to find some target or goals and work fast for it as well. u can be slow.. but then if u are, dun let ur inner rhythem be as well. or else.. u will never achieve anything or accomplish anything.

hmmm. i'm less than a year closer to my taipei trip. hopefully cousin do get someone by then. my dream double date can!! on holidays summore!!!!

Our first Gold Class movie together. not his first time though. i'm getting expensive so i should stop pampering myself. but it's a nice experience!

i come to realise every step we take, every place we went marks down bit by bit of our memories together. i suddenly wish i had kept a diary since day one we were together so i can have all the details of how things happen and my thoughts and words then. i look forward to making more memories and doing things together with you. =) it's you and you only. always have been, always will be.

our next impt step together. takes quite some courage, but i'm pretty sure i want to do it. it has always been in the plan.

i'm having very serious cramps. one of the worst ever and and not even my hot milo can help. can u imagine, giving birht is claimed to be 10 times worse than this. my last packet of life saver milo from amelia is depleted. long story abt the milo..... but just that amelia left 3 or 4 packets of milo @ my place from the last time she came.. and everytime i used one packet... is to save my life.. from gastric to hunger. all sorts of reasons.

so anyway, given today that i have all rights to be emo, i thought about some stuff. like of all the reasons i envisioned us to break up, this is one of the reason that i nv thought of and yet when i thought of it, it seemed ironical yet so logical. and this is one valid reason where both of us cannot do anything abt it.. it's the view, the beliefs all the differences, maybe even the lifestyle? and very difficult to compromise as well. so.... oh well.

i need another hot chocolate drink! it's hurting so badly

A very very nice weekend spent. Friday night was the commissioning ball. @ Rasa Sentosa. I like the place there... the environment and all... maybe i can have my wedding @ sentosa! =) nice dinner, nice place, nice date and nice night. no complaints about it at all and i would let the pictures speak for themselves.

Sat was celebration for xin's 21st birthday. now i realise actually my house to Aloha Changi is so near and it's even nearer to Bark Cafe, i seriously must go there and try one day. I would have enjoy and eaten more xin's party but i was feeling so sick and all... with the mild headache and horrible sore throat. seriously, i sound darn husky now. i would like to think it's sexy! haha...

Sunday was angel's birthday party. =) BBQ!!! my all time favourite. but due to my throat and all.. i try to restrain abit and all too. i hate the feeling of not being able to indulge and enjoy my food seriously. when would this bad sore throat go away. i cann't even teach now can.... with my voice like that. i don't wanna go off key when i teach my students.

continue wishing me health! =)

i'm like down with something. i don't know what but definitely down with something. or going to be down with something. my throat feels sore.. my head's splitting apart. and not to mention i wake up every morning feeling my whole body's going to break apart. =/

however, this is the first time in my entire life trying to take such good care of myself. i down pi pa gao daily. eat panadol at night. drink so much herbal tea i pee every half an hour. i even went to the extent to avoid fried foood which is sooo torturous!!!! and i even try to sleep early and rest rest rest. gosh... and it's all for my fabulous weekend ahead!! nothing can go wrong!

i really wanna enjoy.... wish me health!