i just came back from Batam from my team's monthly meeting. we have been wanting to go overseas for a meeting the longest time. like change the environment and at the same time a retreat and team bonding. as long as i remember, we have been talking about it for 2 years and never once did it. but now finally, we did it!! haha


Batam- the land of Ayam Penyet!


the view from our balcony


了了 and my pedicure. pretty!!


the clear blue sea!


the game that entertained us till 2am plus batam time, which is 3am in singapore time. Topple is the game


giant mug root beer! only @ a & w


=)

I am home alone for tonight and tues night. It is daddy's birthday tmr and so my mum decided to do a sweet short holiday to Genting with him from tonight and will be back on wed.

i love having the house to myself in the day, that is if i am even at home in the day, with my super hectic schedule lately. but i don't like having the house to myself at night. it's not that i m afriad or anything, cos i know i don't have to fear. i guess being an only child always craves to have people around. and being alone is way bottom of my list. thankfully, i am going for a company meeting trip to batam. we have always said we wanna have a quarterly retreat and we finally did it! so at least one night i don't have to be alone. my colleague jokingly asked, next time nic reservice how? i thinking, come back to 娘家? provided mummy allows. haha!

i have not pack, have not done my household chores. i should be packing and all. i think wake up earlier tmr to pack or something. i will catch up on some drama. since i have been so busy the past week

i am seriously considering about hiring a part time pa or secretary. when i am so busy running around with appointments and seminars, this and that, i still have to go handle paper work, minor details, i am so tired! so much trips up and down for small matters when i could have used them for more important stuff.

i m so tired!!!!!

this is all so scary. it's a do or die kind of thing. =(

this weekend was almost close to perfect. everything turned out according to my wishes and i thank God for that. when i have a good time, i eat more than normal, we had frog leg, dim sum, steak, fried chicken, mcspicy, japanese curry rice. haha... we had a little of all of these in just mere 2 days. Luckily for us, we did run a little on saturday morning but don't think it made up for all the food we ate. i know it when i saw the weighing machine just now! hee

and we ended off this weekend sinfully with:




his favourite tiramisu from Haagen-Dazs


as much as you annoy me half the time, we had the best of our times for the past 6 years and i look forward to spending the next 60 years and more with you, my love.

recently, it got me thinking, it will be nice if the boy gets a job overseas and we were to relocate. it will be a time when we have true independence, away from the buzz of our parents and i think that is where we will learn alot more stuff as a couple and as individuals. hmmm.. just a thought.

i'm amazed with how fast bus 12 takes e in the morning from my place to katong or at night from katong back to my place. on sunday mornings wherever i thought i will be late for church, the bus surprisingly gets me to church in 30 mins, sometimes lesser. and on nights where i am so tired, yet the bus is able to get me back in 30 mins or less as well.

BUT... other timings, bus 12 seemed to be SO MUCH SLOWER. like afternoons, it take me 45 mins or more to reach that area and evenings are worse but the stretch on east coast road will be so jam. the bus does not move!

had a relatively good day today. nice meet up with old friend. looking forward to more of such meet ups. =)

i was told i shouldn't keep asking for more. i hate myself for not being able to give myself more. on days like these, i feel so useless. nothing accomplished, nothing to be proud of, nothing to call my own.

i want more but i don't have the right to ask for more. unless i get it myself.

i love weekends when we have the car. makes going anywhere so much more convenient. the weekend that just passed has been great. we have been swamping ourselves with activities and now that bsf have started, we have more work to do during the weekends. yet, despite times like these, i am so thankful we still manage to squeeze quality time out for each other.

had a lovely dinner last night with my aunt and uncle. of course the fact that we went sushi tei @ I12 katong makes me even happier. think i am collecting points so much faster now. it's amazing how my boy could talk and converse with my relatives so much better than with my parents. times like these make me feel i actually have the best of both worlds. totally made my night.

sleep is not on our side lately. we are so easily tired. =/ wanted to catch up abit on our devotion and bsf homwork tgt but we end up taking a nap so long it became dinner time.

i can't wait for 2014.....

Happy Valentines Day, everyone!

i dun have any special vday plans to begin with. thought we will just go for a movie and simple dinner but then we were summoned back to church for youth alpha meeting so we decided to just have a simple dinner at I12 Katong, sushi tei of course. for those who knows, i have an ulterior motive for going there. haha

my vday gift this year is a huge mango. i came back and immediately, this was the conversation i had with daddy.

daddy: eh? where are your flowers?
me: huh? what flowers?
daddy: never get flowers this year?
me: (smiling proudly) i got a huge mango!!!

seriously, my parents thought it was very strange for me not to receive flowers. hello? do they even know nic? my boy is practical like anything and giving me mango cos i like to eat is much more practical than flowers. though i hate the fact that my mum thinks he got me already, like after propose, then no more flowers.

ahhaa... but i love mango!!! but one daisy or sunflower wouldn't hurt. i love sunflowers since secondary school. ask any of my girls! haha

i understand that valentines day is just a day with marked up prices by restaurants, florists and any other vendors who try to use it as a day to earn more money.

however, vday has very significant meaning to me and this can be traced from all the way in my sec. school Back in IJ days, vday is a widely cenebrated day. girls give a stalk of flower, chocolates or sweets and everyone is sure to get something back that day. i love celebrating vday with girlfriends. it adds to the fun and laughter or it all. now that i have the boy, vday becomes a day that we would spend tgt.

practical as he is, vday makes him irritated. the crowd, the marked up prices. he lost the mood to celebrate and among all our special days, vday kills his mood more than anything else. haha!

hmmm... now, maybe there is a way to make February special? and make him hate it less? hmmm....

i m burning my brain out today. fever up to a whopping 37.6 degree. made the boy so angry. cos i didn't know how to take care of myself according him...

haha... well.. he chose to accept the full package didn't he. haha!! hope he doesn't read this

everyone, please meet me for dinners at sushi tei for the whole month of feb!!!! =) in I12 only!!! haha!

It has been a busy and fulfilling weekend for me starting on Friday. And it was on Friday that my shopping spree started as well.

Went to LG with mixed feelings. I was happy to be able to share the good news of my engagement yet at the same time, i know i will be hearing more about the sudden news of one couple moving to Canada. They are close mentors for the boy and I and we had learn alot over the last 1.5 years from them. It saddens us to see them leave but we know in all God's good provisions, this is the best decision for them to make.

Youth Alpha finally started with a loud bang i might say! We have 10 over participants, not counting those who dropped by to visit. I do hope these people can continue coming.



And Alpha's food is always so AWESOME! This is only week 1!



So after my Friday shopping spree @ mphosis, i bought another bag from Charles and Keith. I was almost tempted to buy something from Mango. Everywhere is having sales!



And finally, introducing my new friend after rubee....

I was quite upset when my very old NEC died on me. It has served me since Poly year 1 which was when i realised i need a laptop to do all my projects and all. Or maybe that was an excuse for me to ask my parents to buy me one. But God's timing is perfect. Gave me a timely bonus to spend on this laptop. Oh well, some monies that have to be spent cannot be avoided.

And it's mphosis day today!!! I chanced upon mphosis having sales today and i couldn't resist. I always liked their clothes but it always cannot fit me nicely somehow and i am not so willing to pay their price sometimes.

Anyway, i decided to wear and carry all the things i bought today!! =)

My Bali trip was awesome! There are so many pictures i want to post, so many memories i want to share.



the beautiful sundeck that holds so much memories for me. the moment of tears, joy and laughter.

the whole trip was really like mini honeymoon. i realised the boy emailed the resort to plan it that way. so many nice and awesome surprises. i love the sunset dinner at the beach too. the sunset was so pretty!!



and lastly....



i really wanna post more pictures but then i will end up posting everything. so yea.... i will show u if u ask! hahaa

A really good saturday spent with loved ones before the boy and i fly to bali. today is the annual 'lou-hei' day with my family but be-na-brah decided to do something else before the dinner and that is to take our precious GM to the movies!!



I'm sure GM enjoyed herself alot and we are happy we brought her. =) =) And here's us before Bali.



Pray for journey mercies. Will be back on Tues. =)

It is days like today that make all worries and troubles insignificant.

one thing after another... i'm suffocation!

After 2 good days of visiting, i'm still not ready to start work!! I'm not ready to start anything! i just wanna pack up and go Bali! But i m looking forward to this whole busy week though.

Anyway, this year has been relatively different. I spent the first two days of visiting with the boy and for once, we finally went to visit his mum's relatives. They sure have a lot of people there. I love big family! Too bad, he's not very keen on it, he likes things simple, and less noise. So i don't think I will be able to have a lot of huge family gatherings. =/ But i'm sure everyone in my family loves him. Everyone except one. The unreasonable, fussy one. Good job, my love! Keep up the good work.

our hush puppies shoes!





and let this whole week roll!! =)

I didn't do pedicure this year. my package is still there after 1 year plus. my nail chipped a while ago and i was lazy to ask them to be super careful with it so i decided not to go. i wanted to find something red and i end up with this. haha! maybe i should start doing my nails. troublesome it may be but collecting a lot of nail polish seems fun. haha!

the colour above is called

It's Up To You

Product Code: NI 224

Happy 6th anniversary to us! Well, the actual day is tmr but we decided to pre-celebrate it because tmr is cny reunion dinner day. and both of us will have our own dinners at our homes respectively.

i asked the boy, should we dress to the nines and go out somewhere nice to eat? or should we cook up a blast? he chose the latter so we woke up early in the morning, went for a nice dimsum breakfast and then started our grocery shopping.



and we started cooking a storm:











and the feast is here!



i wanted to do a 4 course meal but seriously, just these 2 almost took up half the day. so tiring. presenting crabcake and handmade ravioli!!



Thank you for the past 6 years worth of memories, love and joy. I look forward to many many more years with you and bali next week!! Lovessss!

went to bff's house today and got surprised by a door gift!



so cute of her! who gives door gift to a random guest who decided to go over last minute just to get shoe membership card. Haha! rather amused by it. and i got tickled by her mum as well. i guess it is always more fun and amusing to talk to other people's mums other than your own.

Anyway, new year resolution: 100 pairs of shoes. Now 3 down, 97 to go! WOOTS! haha!

went mini shoe shopping with the boy. mini because we kinda know what we want already so just go buy! i tend to want to have same things as him so although i didn't think of owning a pair of hush puppies shoes, i end up buying one because he bought one.



something similar to this.

i still need heels though. lots and lost of heels! haha

i just realised this coming sunday is our 6th year anniversary. what should we do? whip up a special 4 course meal, things we never cook before or go to a nice restaurant?

hmmmm....

i had a very fulfilling and tired weekend. happily tired.

LG is back on every Friday. Never prepared for it and frankly, my heart wasn't there. Too long never do homework, need some getting used to. I love fellowshipping and my new resolution is to follow my boy not to eat after 1030 (which is after cell).

Saturday was a long and sweaty day. The boy and i went to grandma's to help out in preparation for the steamboat. Not much to be done cos Empress Dowager likes to do things herself. Afterthought to myself, i should have just push her out of the kitchen and insist on helping. we might have to eat out next year. and there goes one steamboat session, which is always my favourite. then after we are done in the afternoon, it was still early so we popped over to my aunt's place where we started playing kinnect. i seriously sweat like crazy after 15 minutes or so. haha!! and i m even aching now!!! gosh! and then dinner at my grandma's was like a sauna session altogether. we ate in the kitchen, not much wind and the boy commented we are burning calories as we eat! I so agree!

Sunday which is today ended up as last minute cny shopping for clothes. oh we tried CoCo Curry!



it definitely is nice but my boy prefer the GoGo Curry and i chose the wrong dish. The chicken cutlet sucks!!! must remind myself to eat sausage next time and ask for lesser rice. I wanted to prove i more garang than the boy so i took the highest level of spicy-ness. Shiok but burning to the throat. i couldn't even finish the curry. Haha!

so we walked down from somerset to far east, bought quite a bit of stuff. i am still missing a pair of heels which i eyed at charles and keith. just that they don't have my size. i am going to run around a few branches. and i want a bag too!!!!

i have been really upset when my carelessness, forgetfulness and clumsiness caused me to lose one side of my pearl earring and another side of my diamond earring all in the matter of 2 weeks. it matters to me because all these were bought by the boy. if i had bought it myself, i wouldn't have been half upset.

today, much to my very surprise, he sprang me this



i love the ruby studs inside and i love the boy more! i pray i won't lose this EVER!!!!

i have so many pending matters on hand. how to concentrate!?!!

my memory is deteriorating. how to remember???!!!

i am getting clumsier by the minute. I pissed myself off SO MUCH!!!!

ARGHHH!!!! BAD DAY!!! HOW TO LAST TMR!

Genesis 9:16

Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth -NIV

God haven't answer my prayers directly yet but seeing this reassures me that He is still in control. How so? I'm really not sure. I am still quite weak on the inside, waiting to strengthen up. How should I do it? I'm not sure too. But a wise person would say, figure out your why before you think about how. I need to know why i want to do it then i can figure out how i wanna get there.

I had a super lovely weekend. ended on a high note. God, give me strength to endure one more week.

had a relatively eventful saturday. went chinatown in the morning to q for ba kwa. spent around 1 hour plus q-ing for it and luckily i had the boy with me. each q one side and see which line faster. yay!! yummy lim chee guan!!!



feeling a little down lately, so i asked the boy, can we turn the kitchen upside down and do something we never do before? somehow, we settled on rosti, not that big a dish that turns the kitchen upside down. but we never try before. and we even bought a grater just for it. i love my new grater. love buying kitchen utensils, makes me happy.







nothing beats having heineken together with a lovely dinner. =) and then we realised we got so much ba kwa at home but it's all to give people. we didn't buy any to munch ourselves!! darn! so we walked all the way to central to get bee cheng hiang (which is disgusting btw). wanted to jog but end up too lazy. what a way to start the new year. oh well.

为了无能为力的事，我感到很沮丧。
为了再也触碰不到的人，我感到很沮丧。
为了不能想通让爱我的人放心，我感到很无奈。
为了总总的无奈，失落在失落。

i started the day as per any other day until i received a email. such things do happen, i know. but at the start of the year? how sad is that. i need to grow up, i need to learn, i need to control my emotions, i need to open up. why are there so much things to learn to deal with day to day stuff and to deal with people.

i am sniffing like mad now, nose so pain and feeling so jaded.



thanks to b, he brought me to sushi tei, that kinda perked my day a little, i need the weekend to recuperate. anyway, this is their winter promotional items, squeeze rice in squid thingy. the sauce abit sweet.

I'm a super boring loner today.

I went to office slightly later today around 11 and i thought to myself, eh, i should try some of the stalls in ah moy that always has alot of people q-ing for. And recently watched this food show by bryan wong. he recommended this hakka yong tau foo, which i thinking what is so special about. Apparently, they sell 猪肠粉 together with their ingredients. I am not a fan of it so i took just bee hoon soup. Look at before and after I buy.



And that is not even 12 noon. I think the q gets longer.

This is what i had for lunch and dinner.



So boring right. I now end up craving for alot of things. Like Mac's twister fries, korean fried chicken, kembangan mee sua. And the list goes on. I'm so sad i lost my food buddy. =(

i read the Life section of the papers today. Thought this is interesting. 12 must-go places in 2012:

1. Laos
And we can get there in 3 hours! Best time to visit is from Nov to Jan.

2. London
Because they will be hosting the summer olympic games from july 25 to august 12! The royal family is there too!

3. Bhutan
They won the happiness level thing right? Haha!

4. Netherland
For the some flower event, best time to visit is April 5 to October 7.

5. Myanmar

6. Korea
I really want to go!!! They say Yeosu for a world expo to be held there from may 12 to aug 12.

7. Taiwan
To cycle! Best time to visit is sep to nov when rates for hotel are not marked up and the weather is fairly warm and dry

8. Warsaw
For the football fever.

9. Slovenia

10. Belfast
Something about them rebuilding a replica of the Titanic

11. Helsinki

12. US

I'm not so adventurous at the moment (will i ever be?), so i really wanna explore the southeast asia countries more. and places such as taiwan, korea and japan are top on my list on top of the rest of the south east asia countries.

B recently got hooked onto 'You're beautiful", a korean drama. Don't laugh at him, he's really quite addicted to it. i didn't watch with him, maybe just a few mins here and there, but it reminds me of the drama above, 'Coffee Prince' and so someone like me who loves to watch repeated shows couldn't resist but started watching it again.

the scenes i laughed and the many many scenes i cried for. there is this scene where the female lead is so cute, went in to hug the mum when she sleeping to tell the mum she has someone she likes and that she is going to confess she is a girl. the mum hugged her and say it's hard on you. that kind of encouragement and assurance from a mum to a child. there goes my tears again. silly me, I KNOW!



did i add that i love love love the second female lead, she is so pretty, i like her features, like her figure, like her hair!!!! i'm never the kind that will go ooh and ahh for male leads, but for pretty ladies, i will! haha! maybe it is plastic. korean plastic seems to be doing quite well. and success rate and results seems to be satisfactory. maybe i should consider.

first thing i learnt for the new year-- everyone has their own boiling point and it really differs from person to person. when my mum is freaking mad, i find that really funny. however when she makes me boiling hot, she finds it very funny as well. like now, she's angrily packing the mess at the balcony. my huge and tall stack of newspaper, and suddenly, she found a packet of rubbish. I don't know when i left it there and forget to throw, must be quite a while because it's starting to smell. She went hysterical but i found that really funny!

my memory is really getting from bad to worse, what should i do ar? ginko? maybe this is the retribution for laughing at evelyn last time. haha! and i better start remembering my rubbish, mummy just threatened if i forget again, she will make me eat up the rubbish! and i'm laughing out loud again. freaking funny! hahaha

Happy new year from the both of us! Our first picture taken at the strike of 00:00.



We even reviewed our last year resolution together, i did most of the things i wanted to. probably just the exercising part and the saving part. haha! Anyway, 2012 will be a better year for that!



It has indeed been a meaningful weekend thus far and I'm looking forward to a cosy Sunday evening together, with homecooked meal and lost of quality time spent. One of my resolution this year is to have a to-do list. Don't know why but my memory is getting from bad to worse, if i don't start a to-do list and follow through, i will not be half as efficient as i wanted to be.

B and I want for MCP counseling yesterday and there were a lot of take aways. We have to work on our conflict management, not that it is really bad now or that we have huge issues. In fact, we have petty issues but it is good to be able to talk it out and dialogue it. It definitely helped to improve our r/s, especially since we have been dating for a long long time, like coming 6 years this 22nd. A long, constant and steady r/s has its pros and cons. I shall not name the pros which will go on and off. The cons will be taking each other for granted and definitely assuming we understand every aspect of what each other wants all the time. Which may not necessarily be true. Anyway, we did a wishlist individually for what we hope we can have more or less in our r/s. I thought it is a good thing to do on top of our resolutions together on a yearly basis. Not so much a demand list, but rather it's good to talk about things. I love talking. =) =)

Ok, time to go help him out in kitchen. Tata. Happy 2012 everybody. This year will be great, if you believed in it!

Good morning people! Pardon my enthu-ness for blogging. God knows how long this will last. Haha!

Had a lovely Friday evening. Prepared grilled chicken salad for dinner.




I was cutting up the ingredients when suddenly i thought to myself, at the rate we are eating salads, we should invest in a salad spinner! the more i thought of it, the more i wanted it. so after dinner, we end up at ikea and courts. I love going such places at night, too bad they are not 24/7.



Had a bump into with Jeffrey. What are the chances? It's good to know that everyone is doing fine and looking forward to the new year.

Woke up in the morning to prepare breakfast. I love to display my breakfast in a pretty way. It always makes me happy. But of course preparing it for someone a little bit dense (a little!!) is always a bit exasperating. Cos he couldn't tell that it was a flower!! I mean, obvious right! haha!



Anyway, hope everyone have a fun time counting down to 2012. I have my own fair share of things lined up. =) =) I will update soon!

whee! i am so happy with my new blogskin.

new year, new beginning and time to blog more often. A piece of exciting news --> redstripesgreencircles is back!



And to make it a complete year, i finished my puzzle!! It took me roughly 8 months to complete it but that is because i got caught up with work and neglected it for a while. did the puzzle on and off, got bored a while but now that it's completed, i'm so proud of myself. I'm not sure why but I have this thing for puzzle since young and it always makes me very happy to be able to piece up the picture piece by piece. Am going to embark on the next project next year. mr Tan wants me to do the Lord's supper. Challenging but interesting! =)

it's going to be a eventful weekend, with lots to think about and planning to do for the new year. 2012, here i come!

1431

the exciting days to come.

2076

the sweet memories shared.

happiness comes from being able to share this joy. happiness comes from seeing others genuinely happy for us. happiness comes from looking at him and smiling from within. i am finally able to 'move on'. sounds weird, i know.

i thank God for looking out for us, for planning every stage of our lives for us, for knowing what is best for us and giving us only the best.

we finally found the ruby studs we want, the right shape but the colour seems off. pinkish. i want a red ruby! very red ruby!

i started to count my blessings as the day draws nearer. i realised i have a lot of things to be thankful for yet on the other hand, the complacent side of me says, "aren't these blessings coming a little too slow, one at a time?" i think to myself, which side am i convinced.

i'm always in such situation, such a mental battle. the good side of me says something and immediately the bad side has something to retort. Thank God, the good always triumphs, I have so many things to be thankful for. It is just that when I look back at my almost quarter life, i think of the lost friendships, i think of the times when I shouldn't have said this and that, I also think of people whom I missed and not forgetting the things that could still be done in the past but not now.

i feel like posting up a list, but tt's so old school. hahaa! i'm way beyond that now. lots of ideas i wanna share, lots of plans, but without one crucial thing-- money! oh well, i am still counting my blessings. =)

sometimes just being able to call out to You is such a big blessing.

regret is still a regret, whether big or small. sometimes, when opportunities come to you, either you cannot decide or keep pushing it away, now that things has happened without you, i'm regretting!!! boo... but i know it's for the overall better. i'm just feeling sad now. =/

it seems that i'm becoming more worldly as the months passed. I'm conforming to the society, what it expects of me and conforming to worldly views. I should have been contented being different and living my own life the way I want and not worry about the system of the world, the government structure and least of all, other people's tongues.

It's indeed a very grey morning. I begin to realise how untrained I am to adapt to the big things, how much activity I cannot take in at one time. I can problem solve very well, other people's problems that is, because I can use logic and common sense. Apparently, all these does not apply to myself.

I just want a cup of gong cha to cheer me up. Can i please drink finish and then start thinking about all these? All I want now is to dwell in His presence, to be reassured of His words and to leave everything to Him.

i'm so miserable! and my throat hurts, why is this repeating again and again!!!I really wish i have someone to share with this.

grr.. too much to bear

Life doesn't always go the way we want, that I know. When i'm learning how to slowly pick up step by step, life suddenly gave me alot more challenges. Aren't I supposed to learn one step at a time? or must i force myself to take whatever comes my way?

My inconsistency in things is driving me up the wall, how long will this go on

1 Universe, 9 Planets, 204 Countries,809 Islands, 7 Seas, and I had the Privilege to meet you.

this has got to be the worst weekend since a very long time, well technically, i really did have lots of fun on sat with my love but i had to deal with one disappointment after another all in a span of the last 24 hours.

of course, my love was being very very sweet and nice to me throughout and it really helped. I just wished time would stand still and i dun have to go out and face it. can i hide for a weeek and get some other people to deal with it?? gosh....

this is what happens to building a r/s and trust.

i'm overwhelmed with thankfulness that i have such a nice and happy childhood and that i don't have absent parents. This meant alot to me as a only child and that they took the time to attend all functions, events or whatever performance i have. i still remember when i was younger and had to go take my theory exams, these are usually held in schools, different schools around singapore. I made my mum wait for me and make her promise that i will see her when i come out of the room. ahahha.. those were the days.

even if they made mistakes in parenting here and there... this is one thing i have to applaud them for and one good role model that i can look up towards. i hope to be there for my child next time... rain or shine

i feel so ignored these days and misunderstood these days

i never know how to ride on my own momentum, and just like cycles occur to me. so i will never progress this way. i always spiral downwards, then up then down. I should have take the advantage when I am up!

I'm abit lost right now, not sure what to ask for. So I'll pray for God's will to be done. Whatever happens, I will just accept.

meanwhile.. be happy!

you don't always put down all your things and attend to me.

life is so frustrating already, do i need this? but if i don't attend to it, who will? i don't wanna wake up one day to find you missing in my life.

As this is the cooling day, I have time to think, read and think somemore. This is my first time electing and boy, is this a spectacular time, with 82 seats contested out of 87. The heat is on!!!

For areas like Tampines, I don't see much issue which is a weird thing. People Like MBT and Wong Kan Seng should be feeling the heat and not people like Minister George Yeo. I quote somewhere, good candidate, wrong constituency.

I'm a Tampines girl and I love my area. I don't fancy the MP though. I relate to Nicole Seah. 12 years staying in tampines but never meeting my mp and with people around me telling me about how MBT screw up with the public housing and all, i don't know how to support and like him. But frankly speaking, the problem of the public housing is already there. I want to hear wad each party can think of how to solve the issue and so far, i don't like what I heard. There is no feasible confirm can solve this issue.. and importantly, i need the current scheme to stick because i planned my finances based on that. If the new scheme or anything comes in to disrupt it, i'm not i;m able to get my place anytime soon. And frankly, I'm fine with Tampines being better than alot of other areas. The biased-ness is to my favour so good for me and bad for the rest of the people lo.

Who needs real shaking up.. is really bishan's wong kan seng. Heard from chin, her side always walk over... seriously... he needs to take things more seriously NOW!!!! when people talk about having different voices in parliament.. i totally 100% agree.. but can take away those disgusting ones.. and not someone like minister George Yeo or not. He is one of the better ones and pls, I don't even stay in Aljunied now anymore but my heart goes out to him.

I hope he makes it. The last election his votes v close to opposition, my heart heaved a BIG SIGH of relief! I really like him, I hope he makes it.

This is really a month-end syndrome that I'm facing, or rather I would like to label it as that rather than admitting that I'm finding excuses for myself

Today, I was taught we need renewal and rejuvenating of our body, mind and soul. I think I'm very lacking in the second department.

I'm feeeling so "????" right now. I should find a word for it.... any suggestions? It's like a combination of restless-ness/sianess, tiredness of the mind, zombified, spaced out and a lot of other mixed and confused emotions. I need a word for such thing. A codeword....

Ah! I feel so bunnified. I just thought of that word, random i know but whatever~ I just wanna scream somewhere.... I might even delete this stupid post, for now, i just wanna rant

i know what i want for my wedding!! celebrity STYLE!!

hahaha.. this is the effect after watching some celebrity couple get married. hahaa

feels goood after some retail therapy, though nothing for myself. but i still feel good being able to buy things. =)

i really wanna get that puzzle to do but i'm not sure if i have the time to complete it. but I FEEL LIKE

second time on lrt, and one more time on Sunday again. Seriously, why is everyone in that area, far away from me!

Distance is getting to me and I'm getting more disoriented and disorganised... after a long hard day at work, i came hope to fall in the toilet. Now I have an ugly blue black below my knee!! BOO! =(

for You alone deserve all glory
for You alone deserve all praise
Father we worship and adore You
Father we long to see Your face
for You alone deserve all glory
for You alone deserve all praise
Father we love you
and we worship You this day

this is so exciting. mummy got a new lenovo, i secretly named it black pearl for her. haha... and cos i drag her to the IT show with me, i got a printer as well! =) a really good one to serve my purpose. now, i can do alot more things at home, in case office space gets too cramped.

speaking of which, i will be moving to tanjong pagar officially tmr. =) life's great, everything's great.. it would have been better if i get my 2 responses soooon. ahahaha

love love =)

there comes many points in a woman's life where she will keep feeling that she's not needed. i think the biggest blow will be when your kids outgrow you especially. They used to need you but now, they've gained independence. one would start to question the value of her life. i can imagine that kind of feeling, not needed and that you are becoming a burden. you start to be afraid of making requests. then you start to shut yourself away. how sad

alot of things is happening around right now. i feel like i lost something. maybe i really did.

when things are good, i think of all the mistakes i made. when things are bad, i feel like making mistake again. grrr.....

human beings are very delusional at times. We give people options, but clearly one of the option is the better one. So why do people still put in the obviously worst off option, cos like every primary school kid will tell you, it has to be a fair test. We put in the worst off option to make it fair, to be fair to tell the person that there is another way out but time and tests have shown me that, you deep down know that people will choose the better option.

i think humans are made selfish. and come out with reasons to justfiy their own selfishness. been there, done that. only people who still believe in happily ever after believes in fairness and believes that men and women can be equal. in this asian culture we are in, no matter how much women claims to be equal, somethings cannot be equal. for a change, let's do proposal tgt. guys propose with a ring, and maybe ladies propose with a car? a camera? i dunno what the guys like. i'm not saying that there are no woman who initiates a proposal, there are! i saw on tv summore. just that to be fair, then both do it.

i wonder what will happen if someone actually choose the worst off option, what will humans
mind or thinking be like after that?

some happy and not so happy thoughts about the day:

1. had a good time at the hsbc women's golf championship. it's my second day there as early as 8 in the morning. morning sun almost killed me. what didn't kill me got me really dark. came home and straight away put mask. cannot take it mans.

2. i never spend enough time with the boy, that for one but also for missing this morning's service. and importantly MasterLife as well. It would have been a good time of fellowshipping with the rest of the people. oh well, work doesn't occur every Sunday so yups, just have to bear with it a little.

3. Had a nice home cooked dinner.

=) =)

Give me more strength for the week ahead.

i came home to realise the skin on my thumb is bleeding. I dislike the feeling of coming home to find out i injured myself without realising. such things always happen and i don't like it.

quick to listen and slow to pass judgement, is something i'm working towards. another aspect is to stop expecting. this bubble is getting bigger and bigger and inside this bubble is actually nothing. all the hype for nothing. =/ i gotta stop thinking about it.

complacent makes you fat!

I want that Kate Spade bag badly!!!! =(

i had the loveliest time spent with the girls and xm and evelyn. better add their name in case they are reading this. haha!

i love traditions. especially when it's kept year after year. It brings people tgt.. it gives people excuse to come tgt. all in all, i love creating traditions and keeping them year after year. so steamboat, ah ma's ngoh hiong and quality time spent snacking on cny cookies is one tradition i wanna keep for as long as i m around. =)

it's been a long time since i blogged. again. it's a little hard to keep up with blogging lately, is it cos i am getting older? this is something i don't want to think about. I've reached that age when I don't want to grow up so fast. Unlike when i was in my TEENS, i can't wait to grow up but now.. WOAH... slow down mans!

It's a really good cny i had this year, slightly more visitings and more interactions with my relatives. I had fun. I'm still going to hold my annual steamboat party this year as well. Life's been great, everything is good right now. =)

Feb is going to be a fast and short month. I'm aiming towards making everyday count. March got OCBC cycle which i m going to take part, I think, if i'm registered.

i wish i have photos to show about my life.... i'm taking lesser photos as i grow older. =(

seriously cannot have any expectations from you mans.... bitter... sour.... salty... wadever it is.. just NOT SWEET!!! grrrr

home on a Sunday night, not in my best mood, with my bed 'undressed'. just want to lie flat and sleep till tmr. I know tmr is the start of it all again, things did not go so well today, my tummy ache from i dunno what.

I'm supposed to learn how to listen in this new year. not just hear, LISTEN. new year resolution.

why is everyone planting such thoughts in my head? i'm trying not to think badly of the situation or not think badly of the person but why is everyone making me feel that I should and I have the right to be angry. grrr....

don't think don't think. May the new year bring new thoughts to me and bring me to new heights!

3 straight days of homey food, so christmasy feel. =) i'm a happy girl.... my collection of hairbands is increasing and i'm even happier. =) one more week to the end of the year. i was talking to the boy on the long journey home from island SEGAR and we were talking about people's faces. He said he didn't understand how come people can have double face. I told him everyone is bound to have 2 different face, it's a matter of how different one face is from the other and also wad's the intention behind the faces.

i told him.. he's a different person in front of me and in front of friends. He's quicker to anger as compared to when he's dealing with irritating friends. He said that's because it's me. And i told him, exactly, i could trigger that emotion out of him quicker and make him slightly different than when he;'s with colleagues or friends.

I bet people can have more faces than 2 and right now, i;m searching for one that I want to live with. Boon is right, at this age, not young anymore to shake off responsibilities but also not mature enough to handle all of it that comes our way.

I like who I am when I'm with you all. I really do. I just wish.....

Philippians 4:19

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

it was a really gooood dream. i wished i never woke up

this little fettish of mine is expanding... i know times are different now, but i'm still allowed to have one small fettish right. i have to stop alot of things, but just this one, i hope to still have it.

i was reading one very very long ago entries blogged by me 5 years ago and i realised so much has changed. the people around me changed, the bond or the ties between us changed as well. gosh... i don't know if this is for the better or for the worse, because i sounded much happier then, surrounded by people I love so dearly. I still love them very much and i recognise that I will never be who i am today without them. does it work both ways? i have no idea... back then i seemed so sure that whatever i felt is vice versa, today.. 5 years older i have so much doubt. such irony....

it's been a really up and down week.. i m glad it ended with down.. looking forward to the bbq tmr.. =) more fruitful weeks before i go taiwan. =)

what lesson should I learn today? Nothing is for sure mans... I cannot pretend I'm not disappointed. But I hope I do better the next time.

So disoriented now.

one of the best that i've read thus far. the heartaching feeling i have. haik... love romance. oh... how old am i again??

but this is really goood, so sad i dunno whether i wanna continue reading or not.

something seem to be wrong, i dunno what to call it. i just don't feel that right... is this the beginning of the end? i hate to admit it, but everyone is right. I'm insisting on something as far away as a fairytale. don't even talk about 10 years, i don't even know how to carry on for the next few years, let's just hope it is pms acting up.

脚步很轻很轻很轻
你忘了要发出声音
睡的很静很静很静
你忘了说过要一起

天气很晴很晴很晴
你忘了今天不下雨
身体很冰很冰很冰
你忘了要张开眼睛

天空忽然决定下雨
我来不及收拾那些回忆
伞底下的那个你
丢下我去哪里

原来天空没有下雨
湿了的是我哭红的眼睛
滴答滴答滴答滴
我好想念你

i'm really sad to know i can't make it and even sadder to know some things are not going to be as planned.

i posed chin this question today.. if she was a guy... which of us 5 will she think abt being with... of course.. i told her my choice.. hahaha.. interesting....

an overwhelmed surge of nostalgic-ness (whatever the proper word is) came over me when i chanced upon the scrapbook my lovelies made for me when i was 18 years old. not sure if you girls remember but when i took it out and look at the pictures, i was like woah.. we looked so young then. so youthful, so carefree... and everything was so much simpler.

when u girls come over my place next time.. remind me to take it out.... it's really one of the best gift i ever receive.... even if it didn;t brought tears to my eyes 5 years ago... it certainly tugged my heartstring when i saw it again 5 years later....

after three weeks plus or so, the top four is born. netherlands, my favourite orange jersey people, uruguay, the unexpected, it could have just been ghana, germany, the rally on form team and lastly, spain, which i sincerely hope woul dget their asses kick by germany in the semi finals.

these days have been very cold days. and yesterday was one of the worst for me. keep getting caught in the rain. it wasn't the heavy heavy rain kind, but it was slight drizzle the whole day. so everywhere i went, i got caught in the rain bit bit here and there.. didn't bathe until at night around 11 plus. and plus the fact i slept only 3 hours the day before.... i was shivering.. and feeling very very cold while waiting for the match of spain and paraguay to begin.... and thanks to the wonderful creation of panadol... i took only one pill.. and after a while... i felt so much better.. really quite scared tt i will fall sick and all cos i dun have the time to fall sick.

well, all thanks to our wonderful creator, he gave me a beautiful sunday, a well rested body and the best boyfriend, had a nice cosy sunday.

i miss you

i forgot how painful cramps can be. i almost forgot all the aching symptoms that i have before it comes... and it all came back today. i always dream of having a hot water bottle to hug.... forgot how much i need it in the past, and the painful aching feelings all came back today.... nonetheless... my lovelies gave me a wonderful time today. i forgot abt the pain halfway through, and the pain actually left for a while.. but now at night.. in the middle of england v germany match, the pain is back.

board games are so fun... i feel like going back on ladies night.. which is a tues.. not this tues... hmmmm.... some arranging needs to be done. i still think the question about who u wanna get to do a shady business.. how could anyone have thought of me. i'm not tt dark... and meticulous... haha!

i love u girls and my boy... always will.. who else can tolerate me anyway.....

i'm so digging the new dcp world cup tee shirts... but 50 bucks for a tee shirt?? hmmmm.. and a working class girl doesn't have much opportunity to wear one anyway.. but it's sooo cute!

and yes ghana!! you're in!

more than half of the top 16 is out. halfway there.... for me too. i'm a very happy girl recently... at least i know i got nothing to be unhappy about. somehow... something still seem to be missing... oh well.... soccer has made my nights happier... hang in there first and see where i will land.

i think i made my daddy the happiest this entire month. everytime he comes home, the soccer channel is on. every single time.. unlike the past.. he had to fight the tv for it, and since there are 2 women in the house, he obviously don't get his way all the time. except saturday.. the ladies of the house decided to give him one night.. and that's sat. so this whole entire month, he's going to be a happy man.. coming home to soccer everyday.. i know my boy is not like that.. i wonder does he want to come home to cartoon everyday instead. hhahahaa!

so the next match.. ghana and australia... go ghana!

alot of people start to put distance between themselves and other people, be it in a drift away style or interact very little with people is usually cause they are afraid. they are afraid people will see through them. they have things to hide. maybe not in the bad way.. more of maybe they are feeling moody, emotional.. or simply in a i don't give a shit to this world kind of mood so they don't want to be near people, to pretend to enjoy company. they rather be by themselves. and the other kind is they have a true self tt maybe only really close people know. or maybe only they themselves know and no one else know and they are afraid that people outside will find out this secret self... and judge. thus, they rather not interact.

for instance.. a person can start drifting away from a group... and hang out less outside.. keep going home after work/school. u think tt person is in a emotional, moody period.. but it might not be. when people drift away from social group, maybe cause they done something that they are not proud of, they are upset... and they know people will judge.

so why oh why do people judge... that's like a whole separate issue really.

i need a retreat.

the long wait is finally over! i'm very very excited... the world cup is starting in less than 3 hours time. wooots. =) it's going to be a month of sleepless nights but roaring excitement. maybe alot of people might not understand why i'm so excited about it.... even my own boy don't. hahaa... i'm never a girl who likes soccer. what league what league.. i never ever watch.. but i just like world cup.. ask me who i support ar... not any country in particular.. just like to support it match by match.. make some predictions... overall champion.. hmmm.. maybe brazil... any country but SPAIN. haha.. oops.. i got something against them. i wonder why.

i just bought a new laptop.. rubee!! i'm really happy. finally.. the antique can be used for only office purpose. i don't have to carry laptop to and fro. no more heels and heavy load in arms. and if u guys know, i'm a sucker for high heels.. like quite high heels.. cos i think those are the only ones that are pretty.. and so my poor feet suffers with me. ahahaa.

back to world cup.. first match.. host country vs mexico.... i'm thinking it might be a draw.... mabe host can surprise me? i need more people to watch with me.. spread the joy. hahaa...

i'll be back

hello world.... i'm back. am i long forgotten? replaced? in anyway... i'm back. =)

it's been a very meaningful journey for myself in the last 6 months. a journey that i intend to continue walking. somewhere that i see myself walking to without seeing any end to it. yet. haha.... whatever it is, it's good to be back. i should start keeping track of my thoughts, share my beliefs, my nonsense again. i do miss bloggging quite abit where i can rattle and rattle.

i hope people still come here to check on me every once in a while....