i hate myself for being so weak and vulnerable. i hate myself for caring so much. the old saying is so true. the one who cares more loses most. being selfish seems like a better way out of this mess. i hate this feeling inside me. i hate it... time is on my side... and i hate it. i know what having time can do to me. i hate it. yucks.. everything sucks. big time!

love, hope and faith.... is all being put to test. and hope is plunging way down.