immersing myself in jay chou's new songs. some are really fantastic. like some notes, phrases, words, chords just strike some emo-ness in me.

waiting is never a good feeling. simple things like if i was waiting for a call, i wouldn't dare to go bathe or do anything else but wait for that call. if it's fruitful, then never mind, but if the call i was waiting for never came, won't i be wasting my time. friends are now all studying for exams, stressing, rushing to meet project deadlines yet i'm still struggling here, looking for meaning in my life. i was just telling amelia moments ago that casting lots of obligatory stuff that i have to do, i'm pretty much leading a life of a solitude. i'm still very much the same little girl i was years ago, just that i kind of managed to cover it up over the years. but when i peel off everything that's on the surface, i'm still that me. no where here or there.

i'm asking for directions.