human beings are very delusional at times. We give people options, but clearly one of the option is the better one. So why do people still put in the obviously worst off option, cos like every primary school kid will tell you, it has to be a fair test. We put in the worst off option to make it fair, to be fair to tell the person that there is another way out but time and tests have shown me that, you deep down know that people will choose the better option.

i think humans are made selfish. and come out with reasons to justfiy their own selfishness. been there, done that. only people who still believe in happily ever after believes in fairness and believes that men and women can be equal. in this asian culture we are in, no matter how much women claims to be equal, somethings cannot be equal. for a change, let's do proposal tgt. guys propose with a ring, and maybe ladies propose with a car? a camera? i dunno what the guys like. i'm not saying that there are no woman who initiates a proposal, there are! i saw on tv summore. just that to be fair, then both do it.

i wonder what will happen if someone actually choose the worst off option, what will humans
mind or thinking be like after that?

some happy and not so happy thoughts about the day:

1. had a good time at the hsbc women's golf championship. it's my second day there as early as 8 in the morning. morning sun almost killed me. what didn't kill me got me really dark. came home and straight away put mask. cannot take it mans.

2. i never spend enough time with the boy, that for one but also for missing this morning's service. and importantly MasterLife as well. It would have been a good time of fellowshipping with the rest of the people. oh well, work doesn't occur every Sunday so yups, just have to bear with it a little.

3. Had a nice home cooked dinner.

=) =)

Give me more strength for the week ahead.

i came home to realise the skin on my thumb is bleeding. I dislike the feeling of coming home to find out i injured myself without realising. such things always happen and i don't like it.

quick to listen and slow to pass judgement, is something i'm working towards. another aspect is to stop expecting. this bubble is getting bigger and bigger and inside this bubble is actually nothing. all the hype for nothing. =/ i gotta stop thinking about it.

complacent makes you fat!

I want that Kate Spade bag badly!!!! =(

i had the loveliest time spent with the girls and xm and evelyn. better add their name in case they are reading this. haha!

i love traditions. especially when it's kept year after year. It brings people tgt.. it gives people excuse to come tgt. all in all, i love creating traditions and keeping them year after year. so steamboat, ah ma's ngoh hiong and quality time spent snacking on cny cookies is one tradition i wanna keep for as long as i m around. =)

it's been a long time since i blogged. again. it's a little hard to keep up with blogging lately, is it cos i am getting older? this is something i don't want to think about. I've reached that age when I don't want to grow up so fast. Unlike when i was in my TEENS, i can't wait to grow up but now.. WOAH... slow down mans!

It's a really good cny i had this year, slightly more visitings and more interactions with my relatives. I had fun. I'm still going to hold my annual steamboat party this year as well. Life's been great, everything is good right now. =)

Feb is going to be a fast and short month. I'm aiming towards making everyday count. March got OCBC cycle which i m going to take part, I think, if i'm registered.

i wish i have photos to show about my life.... i'm taking lesser photos as i grow older. =(

seriously cannot have any expectations from you mans.... bitter... sour.... salty... wadever it is.. just NOT SWEET!!! grrrr

home on a Sunday night, not in my best mood, with my bed 'undressed'. just want to lie flat and sleep till tmr. I know tmr is the start of it all again, things did not go so well today, my tummy ache from i dunno what.

I'm supposed to learn how to listen in this new year. not just hear, LISTEN. new year resolution.

why is everyone planting such thoughts in my head? i'm trying not to think badly of the situation or not think badly of the person but why is everyone making me feel that I should and I have the right to be angry. grrr....

don't think don't think. May the new year bring new thoughts to me and bring me to new heights!

3 straight days of homey food, so christmasy feel. =) i'm a happy girl.... my collection of hairbands is increasing and i'm even happier. =) one more week to the end of the year. i was talking to the boy on the long journey home from island SEGAR and we were talking about people's faces. He said he didn't understand how come people can have double face. I told him everyone is bound to have 2 different face, it's a matter of how different one face is from the other and also wad's the intention behind the faces.

i told him.. he's a different person in front of me and in front of friends. He's quicker to anger as compared to when he's dealing with irritating friends. He said that's because it's me. And i told him, exactly, i could trigger that emotion out of him quicker and make him slightly different than when he;'s with colleagues or friends.

I bet people can have more faces than 2 and right now, i;m searching for one that I want to live with. Boon is right, at this age, not young anymore to shake off responsibilities but also not mature enough to handle all of it that comes our way.

I like who I am when I'm with you all. I really do. I just wish.....

Philippians 4:19

"And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."

it was a really gooood dream. i wished i never woke up

this little fettish of mine is expanding... i know times are different now, but i'm still allowed to have one small fettish right. i have to stop alot of things, but just this one, i hope to still have it.

i was reading one very very long ago entries blogged by me 5 years ago and i realised so much has changed. the people around me changed, the bond or the ties between us changed as well. gosh... i don't know if this is for the better or for the worse, because i sounded much happier then, surrounded by people I love so dearly. I still love them very much and i recognise that I will never be who i am today without them. does it work both ways? i have no idea... back then i seemed so sure that whatever i felt is vice versa, today.. 5 years older i have so much doubt. such irony....

it's been a really up and down week.. i m glad it ended with down.. looking forward to the bbq tmr.. =) more fruitful weeks before i go taiwan. =)

what lesson should I learn today? Nothing is for sure mans... I cannot pretend I'm not disappointed. But I hope I do better the next time.

So disoriented now.

one of the best that i've read thus far. the heartaching feeling i have. haik... love romance. oh... how old am i again??

but this is really goood, so sad i dunno whether i wanna continue reading or not.

something seem to be wrong, i dunno what to call it. i just don't feel that right... is this the beginning of the end? i hate to admit it, but everyone is right. I'm insisting on something as far away as a fairytale. don't even talk about 10 years, i don't even know how to carry on for the next few years, let's just hope it is pms acting up.

脚步很轻很轻很轻
你忘了要发出声音
睡的很静很静很静
你忘了说过要一起

天气很晴很晴很晴
你忘了今天不下雨
身体很冰很冰很冰
你忘了要张开眼睛

天空忽然决定下雨
我来不及收拾那些回忆
伞底下的那个你
丢下我去哪里

原来天空没有下雨
湿了的是我哭红的眼睛
滴答滴答滴答滴
我好想念你

i'm really sad to know i can't make it and even sadder to know some things are not going to be as planned.

i posed chin this question today.. if she was a guy... which of us 5 will she think abt being with... of course.. i told her my choice.. hahaha.. interesting....